Welcome to the Gamradt 's Bed and Breakfast. It's a pleasant, cozy, quaint home located on a busy street. We have three comfortable and pleasing rooms but they are all taken so you will have to stay on either our soft micro-fiber couch or recliner. We also offer sleeping bags if you feel the floor will satisfy your needs. At this 5 star award winning bed and breakfast you will not only enjoy our 1987 structure but you will also enjoy our amenity's. At our place you will be awaken by the pleasant smell of a 100lb chocolate lab licking your face. Breakfast will be self-served and while your in the kitchen please feel free to make enough for two boys, a 2 year old girl, and 2 adults. The other thing that we feel we can offer you over our competition is a swimming pool. Our pool is open 24 hours or until the air leaks out. You can drink under the palm tree as you enjoy the Northwest outdoors but get there early because there is only enough room for one person...ah who are we kidding a half a person. If you are looking for some excitement take a ride on the elephant slide. It's the newest fasts slide on the market, the people in the biz call it the elephant 7000SS (SS = Slippery Slide) We do offer a life guard but she is only 2 and needs to take a nap from 1pm - 3pm and might need a diaper change while you swim, if you don't mind. We do ask for everyone not to dive into the pool because it is only 0.3048 meters. (1 foot for you stupid Americans)
Here is our life guard on duty.
She has passed the Gamradt life guard class which only consisted of making sure she kept her two hands on the rail. We didn't even think about teaching her how to do CPR....We really just hired her because she was so darn cute.
Like I mentioned before NO DIVING but you can dunk your head.
We did spend a little extra when we bought the elephant 7000SS (SS = Slippery Slide) we actually upgraded and added the elephants trunk squirter so feel free to bring your own cup and fill it up and yes you can drink it. It's probably taste better then the water in the house.
The Gamradt Bed & Breakfast has won numerous awards over our 4 years of existence. Don't just take our word for it take ex-inmate John Jacobs word for it, "This sure beats my prison cell." Thank you John and thank you for your business.
We did spend a little extra when we bought the elephant 7000SS (SS = Slippery Slide) we actually upgraded and added the elephants trunk squirter so feel free to bring your own cup and fill it up and yes you can drink it. It's probably taste better then the water in the house.
The Gamradt Bed & Breakfast has won numerous awards over our 4 years of existence. Don't just take our word for it take ex-inmate John Jacobs word for it, "This sure beats my prison cell." Thank you John and thank you for your business.
4 comments:
Love it---do you guys provide the sunscreen, or do your guests have to bring their own??
Looks like Addyson will have hours of fun in her pool, like the trunk sprinklers, nice touch on that baby. It won't be long and the boys will be sliding in there too:)
Hilarious! Love it! We are heading to the Hilton in Portland this weekend...I bet it will hardly compare to your place! Your place sounds much more fun:)
Absolutely HILARIOUS! I had tears in my eyes reading this. I think it would be funny for each of us with kids to write something like this...fun to see the differences. I have an 80 lb Golden Retriever that thinks your face is a personal tongue itcher...all guests would LOVE it! Great posts, Ryan. I really enjoy reading these.
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